Financial abuse is one of the main ways that men use to control women and make them feel helpless to escape. If there is a child involved, then the financial pressure can be even more suffocating as the woman is even more dependent on her husband. Financial abuse can exist without other abuses but is often the beginning of a man exerting his control. In this article, we take a look at 5 ways that financial abuse may occur.
Making Career Decisions For You
If your spouse insists on where you can work or for how many hours, then this is a big warning sign that abuse may follow. This is especially so if he attempts to get you to quit your job and rely on him to pay the bills. If you are not being encouraged to work and look for a better job to enter, then it is likely that he has sinister goals in mind. Abusers may also attempt to have a woman become pregnant which will eventually take her away from work.
He Controls The Flow Of Money
Do you have to hand over your paycheck to your husband who then gives you a stipend which barely covers your transportation and lunch? Does he keep a track of every penny you spend and require you to give an account of all your expenses? Has he put all the bills in your name and all the assets in his name? Has he insisted that you close your account and all the money be put into an account which only he has access to? These are some of the tactics that abusers may use to control the flow of money and suppress their wives. If your husband is making excuses for these types of actions, then he may not be sincere and you may be in danger. It is fine to have a joint account that you both put some savings into but you should also try to have your own account.
He Harasses You At Work
Some abusers are unable to get their wives to leave their jobs so they resort to making her work life unbearable. The methods used include continuous disturbances via calling or texting to create pressure for your employer to terminate your employment. An abuser may also physically go to your workplace and make a disturbance with the aim of getting you fired. There have also been cases where the abuser intentionally sabotages his wife by disabling her vehicle to prevent her from going to work. These are all strategic plans which the victim is ill-prepared for and can be very devastating to her psyche.
He Uses Your Money Without Your Consent
Many abusers will make the excuse that you are now married so your money is now his money. This violates the bond of trust between you especially if you are put in debt by his actions. By spending your money he is directly affecting how much is available to you and limiting your options. As a couple, you should be making decisions together. You should not be blindsided by reckless spending. A man who isn’t working may also use this to restrict his partner’s savings to keep her with him.
Threatens To Abandon You
If a woman is financially dependent on her husband and he threatens to desert her, then this is a form of financial abuse. His aim is to establish a dominant control over his wife. She has to do as he commands or face the consequences. The terror of losing the basic necessities of life is enough to keep his wife in check. He will also make excuses or directly prevent her from getting a job and gaining her financial freedom.
It might appear to be very hard for you to leave your husband and gain your freedom but you can do it. There are many abuse survivors and you can become one as well if you make the appropriate plans and take action. You can find more information about financial abuse in the book, “Time to Go“. Thank you for reading. Please feel free to get in touch. Don’t forget to comment on this article as your thoughts and experiences are highly valued.