You have taken charge of your life by leaving your abusive relationship and you are to be applauded for taking that step. Now begins the road to recovery, which will take time as you rediscover yourself and the world around you. This article may assist you along this new journey with some pointers for you to consider.
Do Not Start A New Intimate Relationship too soon
Many women make the mistake of starting a new relationship within months of leaving their abuser. There is a high probability that this may not work out because you are not ready for a relationship as yet. You need time to build your self-confidence and know your self-worth before you even think of letting someone else into your private life. If a potential suitor presents himself shortly after you have left your abuser, tell him that you are not ready. A true gentleman does not pressure a lady. There will be more opportunities for you to find love again when you are whole.
Develop A Comfortable Routine
To help with the healing process, it is wise to plan your day to day activities. A structure is an important step in recovery. You may start slowly and add more activities as your confidence grows. Do not berate yourself if you are unable to get everything done. Commit to continue pushing yourself. If you persevere with organizing your life, you may become more accepting of yourself and where you are. You will know that you are able to live your life without anyone directing your actions for you.
Reconnect With Family And Friends
There is a high chance that your ex-abuser had influenced you to rely solely on him and cease or reduce communications with your family and friends. You may feel reluctance at first due to the circumstances that led to severing these relations. Be assured that you can overcome this. The people who love you will be understanding and may even have been aware of your plight and felt helpless to assist you. Put your pride aside. Do not be afraid to talk about your experience. This is a necessary part of your recovery.
Engage In Group Activities
Joining a support group for abuse victims is a good way to find strength, motivation and closure. If you are not up to being around strangers as yet, you may get started by taking a class. This will help you to get out and about with people in a more comfortable environment of your choosing. It is suggested to get active. An exercise class or something that takes you outdoors, for example hiking with a group, would be a good start. If you were physically abused, you may consider taking a self-defense class to help empower you. Of course, you can always go out dancing with your friends if you are so inclined and burn some calories while having fun.
Seek Divine Guidance
If you have never felt driven to follow a religion, then you should seek harmony and balance in your inner self. Putting your soul at ease may be the most important piece of the recovery process. It does not matter which faith or creed you follow. The important thing is to reconnect with God spiritually. You may have felt that God abandoned you in an abusive relationship with a man you may now see as a devil. But this was never so. You were always provided with a means to end your abuse through His love for you. Do not mistake the trials and difficulties in your life as a punishment from God. By reconnecting with your Heavenly Father, you are recommitting to doing what is right for your life through His guidance and love.
The healing and rebuilding process after an abusive relationship does not happen overnight. This may take many years to complete. Do not be ashamed to cry or feel self-pity because these things are normal. Take things slowly and make a note of the progress that you make. This will aid you in taking greater control of your life and getting back to a normal life. You can find more detailed information about healing and rebuilding your life in my Amazon bestseller book, “Time to Go“.